Wednesday, July 02, 2008
note
Current mood: disappointed
Category: Life
I hung on tight for dear life
Even though I'm now alone
In the very least at least I know I tried
Maybe I'm a fool and I have cried
At least I didn't give up without a fight
5:00 AM -
copyright LGHurcomb 22 Feb 2018
Me 5am LGHurcomb
Just do right
You know it by the satisfaction in your soul
Do it not for some eternal gain or external law
Just do right
It will bring you protection that nothing can steal
Living without regrets Because it is right to do
Then when you leave others will fare thee well
And send with you their prayers
Just do right Leaving things better off because you passed
It’s yours to choose because its good for you
Because it’s right to do
copyright LGHurcomb 22 Feb 2018
Me and my granddaughter holding my grandmother's camera the next in a tradition of women photographers in our family Photo by Wolfgang Bucher 2018
At times you may feel small and you may appear to be but,
Courage is THE virtue that without nothing else can be
so, don't be small instead,
Be a rainbow in the dark clouds
Complete universes of light peel into every color
When you wrestle with the Demons,
Laughter be your armor and love your shield maiden
and be a rainbow that says, “The rain has come and we still LIVE”
Remember me and know,
You’ve already been bought and paid for
anointed for a throne
so when the storm blows over losing its strength
Laugh rise up even higher then before
and Be a rainbow!
copyright LGHurcomb 22 Feb 2018
A rainbow in my pocket 10 MAY 2010 copyright LGHurcomb
I’m always writing poems about love
Well here’s one more only, it's about true and lasting love.
I had a pint of berries for my breakfast that
I didn’t have to go to market for,
That I didn’t have to pay for or payback for,
What’s more I didn’t ask for them
and they are my favorite foods!
A kindness extended to me of something I really need!
some one who feeds me!
… somebody raised my daughter right!
copyright LGHurcomb
copyright Lurcomb
Copyright LGHurcomb
Night Storm, 04JULY2014 copyright! LGHurcomb
Monday, July 14, 2008
Pitiful
Current mood: melancholy
Category: Life
On my own all alone
Echoes though my mind
Take charge of your self.
Drive your own bus
Who knew living
moment by moment
would take up so much time.
copyright LGHurcomb
Monday, June 23, 2008
fading away
Category: Life
With murder in my heart I wish death.
To carve away the excess to reveal her again, she who I ate to protect
With rhythms of the younger belly dancers jangle of hips, purple, red, gold
Veils, coins, seduction, lust has unseated me. She toys beyond my reach
Uprooted my deeply held illusion of self-beauty I became not good enough.
A fatal blow So in protest on strike I control the one thing left
my own lips
I never understood so clearly
Why cutting covers a greater wound
copyright LGHurcomb
Copyright LGHurcomb
what was, 12JAN2018 Copyright~ LGHurcomb
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Your Silence
No messages, no rings, in rhythm with the weather
Silence is the season we're now expressing
After a spring time of obsessive contact
Rain has frozen; Snow has fallen quietly blanketing over all
Hiding the potently deadly ice
Winter's season chokes the roadways
Passions sleeps tucked way under silken snow
copyright LGHurcomb
Kansas cicadas life cycle ends copyright~ LGHurcomb 28AUG2017
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
by simply being me
Category: Life
"What have i become, my sweetest friend, everyone I know goes away in the end.
And you can have it all
my empire of dirt.
(by simply being me) I will let you down ….. I will make you hurt." *
Sometimes I wish I were a l kid again; skinned knees are easier to fix than broken hearts.... AND so many things in life crush hearts. But I don't remember my childhood with fondness.... maybe i wish I WASN'T a redheaded stepchild again.
It's raining, the truck is broke down, my dog r-u-n-n o-f-t-ed… and the best lover I've ever had just left me for my own good
………………Or this another part of my life sounds a lot like a sad song.
I was drawn to the dumpster down the street to check out the masonite panels that were sticking out. I saw them when I drove by a couple of days before. They haunted me beckoning, reaching out even in my dreams until I could assure myself they were way to battered from their previous usage to hold paint. But it has planted a need in me for a full panel to paint on. Just flippn great! Dam the artistic nature that twists my inner spine, ever searching, thinking conversing with itself…myself. I walk back home in the dark of the street where I have live out the last 23 years of my own personal soap opera. I looked up at sparking Orion and wondered, have I learn what I needed to from this chapter? Is it closed now? Did I leave the last one I touched better off, giving the best I could? did I really?
The four agreements cover this…..
1) No assumptions, less misunderstandings
2) Do the best I can, what ever my best is for that moment, less chance for regrets
3) Speak with integrity; words are powerful so say what I mean, use words to help and heal.
4) Don't take things personally, what a person does or says, says more about themselves then anything. **
..........I am more convinced the older I get there IS no justice at least not here and it's insanity to expect such. The best I can do is to let be, free my attachment and expectation. Know I have no control just roll. I got it early on, when I was 3. I understood then the only true power is love. Because if I fill myself with love hate has no power And nobody can damage the lasting part of me unless I allow them to. The only demons here are the ones I myself have invited.
.................................................So why do I feel so bad still knowing?
Maybe because as a great philosopher said... "the heart has reasons which reason knows not."***
How can a humid summer night in Kansas feel so cold.
copyright LGHurcomb
*(written by Trent Reznor of Nine Inch Nails ) **(Don Miguel Ángel Ruiz) ***(Blaise Pascal)
as it fell on 18 Jan 2017 copyright~LGHurcomb
Monday, October 15, 2007
dead set
Current mood: awake
Category: Life
Unable to sing Angelic muse with a beautiful face Is falling from Grace
Losing his grip
Fear's strangle hold scarring his heart
Restricting its beat
What should be a heaven transforms to hell's pit beyond Graces optimistic embrace
Where truth is a side plot
Mental illusion binds her hands and her feet
He insists she plummet off rocky cliffs,
after draining their ocean dry.
Grace tries to open salt tear swollen eyes from
Only to awake drowning in a dream of failed him
Angelic muse with a beautiful face dead set on falling from Grace
copyright LGHurcomb
What makes a Rose perfect? 14 May 2015 Last Ravenwolf Rose Bush copyright~ LGHurcomb
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
How cruel fate
Current mood: annoyed
Quiet
Is my life
Silent's is my day
Business is all that calls
Since my friend has gone away
Watering the flowers
Cutting growing grass
Weeding in the garden
None to share my victory or my loss
Painting in the studio images never seen
Putting in the darkroom sink
None working by my side
silver images to create
Walks alone, sleep the same
Why has change been forced?
Oh, How cruel fate
When loneliness I embrace
What lesson do I have to learn?
God, why put me in the place
now with name and a face
without trying
To Inherited Maya's Dance
copyright Lghurcomb 25 June 2008
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
chunks of stone
I try to sleep alone aware how the coming Darkness tricks your demons alive. Knowing if i am out of reach craziness fills in the gap.
You call me at midnight after I had gone to bed. Loneliness is such an evil drug for an unstable mind.
thinking staying away will save me but, even in the distance I can still feel your pain
It seeps across the darkness of any empty evening As if you're still holding my hand.
You wonder if I laf at your situation.
Like obsession has made you some kind of jester but, how can you not see,
I 'm crying? I call you back just to hear you breathe some how it's comforting,
Endless chatter to fill the gap only belays what's really happening.
Even in your silent's I feel your pain oozing across the canyon of protection you've created.
Lying awake in bed with your sweet smell still lingering, on my sheets or in my memory,
I wanted to be the gargoyle that guards you in your sleep.
But you have pushed me off your cathedrals roof top,
My shattered chunks of stone lay upon the ancient cobble stones.
copyright LGHurcomb
copyright~ Lghurcomb 2009
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Here comes the rest of my life
Current mood: indescribable
Category: Life
In a bed by myself
With a pain in my chest and
a knowledge of how things are
I woke with a quiet resolution to a
Kinda peaceful resignation.
a weird feeling that this has all been
my break in an existence that
may be to long. Pulling back and
here it goes now, no use to cry over
what I've no control anyhow
Here comes the rest of my life
copyright LGHurcomb
Sunday, June 22, 2008
a list of good things
Current mood: blessed
Category: Life
LIST ONE OF GOOD THINGS:
Kisses
Hugs
Holding hands
Passion
Making Love
Puddles
Ripped sheets
Brushing long curly soft Black Hair
Being a real redhead
Pinkness
Velvety skin
morning wake up calls
Pipito
Loving
Making things happen
Becoming a better person
Being accountable
Being trustworthy
Trying one's best
Hugs
Being upset
Making up
A nose against a warm neck
Breathing in the scent of one loved
Birdies
Hot showers
embarrassing the neighbors
Inside jokes…. To infinity and beyond
400.00 dinners
Dreams of Egypt
Connection
Eggs, salsa, tortillas, beans, and rice
Haystacks with pickles
Strawberry ice cream
Chili peppers
Dinner together
Potlucks
To many tomato plants in buckets
Movies
Doing what ever you put your mind to
Childhood scars
Kisses
Trips in a mini
Walks
Workouts
Swimming
Finally winning a race
Watching kids grow
Seeing achievements
Poppies and Bubbie
Hammocks
Central Air in old houses
Working together in a darkroom
Paintings done in the middle of the night
Laughter
Pain
Feeling
Growing
Changing
Spending time together
Being able to call anytime
Helping hands
Filling dumpsters
Nerds
Matching computers
Chicago
Campers
Having only chairs
Having only a table
Belonging
Rough chins
Smooth chins
New lawn mowers
Cutting my grass
Gardens
Sharing
Riding bikes
Caring
Eating out
Trying to learn to dance
Little dogs who speak Spanish
Cats who type
Touching
Photographing
Watching sleep
Tangled legs
Sleeping next to
SiFi
Deals
Having my own friend
Dreams
Tubs with a view of the lake
Feeling whole
Shared memories
The chance to know you
Knowing you're anywhere
unfinished business
Knowing I'm special to you
Living life together
forgiving yourself so we can be us
4:51 AM -
copyright LGHurcomb
Monday, July 23, 2007
Breaking Habits
Current mood: awake
Category: Life
She knows how to use my phone to call
I was told he didn't feel like talking
So I reprogrammed my phonebook
To move numbers away from the top so she can't
Phone so easily next Sabbath
The setting sun looking like a red orange
Fireball in the western sky
Last night did anybody else see it?
I am not supposed to call
Raven saw the moon from the car window as
I took her back to her Grandparents home.
"See moon Bubbie?" "Yes I do, do you see the sun?"
"Yes, Bubbie I see." She's so sweet.
I am not supposed to call
So I talked to Logan on the phone
About details of this or that
When I got home I walked to the post office
To buy a stamp and mail a bill for the second time
It had been rejected for lack of 2 cents of postage
I am not supposed to call
So I dropped off Jo's package in the UPS drop box
Walked to my household talking on the phone to Anna about
Having to finally do something about
The extra animal at my house who needs a home
Setting a new final deadline this week
I am not supposed to call
Back home I called Logan again to say if she wanted turtle
She was welcomed to him.
I am not supposed to call
Got myself ready for bed. Washed my face
My car alarm went off, freaked me out so
I turned on all the outside lights checked the doors twice
Feeling so very alone I had to decide if I should
Who I should call, let the extra beast loose in the house
Phoned Jo who brought his crew and
They chased away my fear looking in every hiding space
And leaving
Me with two more numbers to call
Got in to bed with lights on Kate called to ask
If Sophia could come over
Before sunrise next, work not jiving with her care
Fine with me
I am not supposed to call
Spend a couple of hours with the TV
Sleep setting for and hour and a half
With no goodnight
I am not supposed to call
10:33 PM -
copyright LGHurcomb
MY GARDEN CATCH OF THE DAY
I am posting parts of emails that I have been asked questions from my body work clients about health and nutrition..... thought it might be good just to go ahead and post some of the info here on face book.
Remember to eat pears... they are know to lower blood pressure and up fiber. One pear provided a fourth of the fiber a person needs in a day.
Small changes make the biggest differences because we stick to them so find small ways to change your everyday way of doing things.
I recommend reading the coconut oil miracle ..... coconut water and young coconut meat are high in potassium and have other wonderful healing powers for the human body.
I suggest starting the day with a drink that helps clean and restore the body systems. Lemon and raw honey.... I use a large cappuccino cup. I put in honey and the juice of a lemon and hot water. I like it tart but you adjust it to your own taste. Drink as often as you like! make it by the pitcher full and drink all day. This mixture alone is a good healer but your rebuilding your body so you might want to add to this mix about 10 to 15 drops of Grapefruit seed extract. This can be purchased at whole foods. The GSE is very bitter and strong and should be added to juice to be taken. And notice i said RAW honey. Honey doesn't need to be processed as it's a natural preservative. When it's pasteurized it's healing enzymes are killed making it a dead food. The more local your honey the better it is for you because the bees have gathered it from local plants which will help heal allergies.
Garlic is also a wonderful healing food. Some suggest eating it raw but I live by the motto it must taste good or i don't put it in my mouth (works on several levels!) so I roast it and spread it on toast or add it to pastas.
You'll need to consume orange and dark green leafy veiggies several servings a day... to give your body what it needs to rebuild. Your asking your flesh to heal itself so you need to provide the raw materials for it to do just that. A good cheaters way is to drink a couple of naked juices... superfood. Pro biotic foods are also important. Kefir and yogurt being the most common. They are important because if your body can't brake down the foods to usable nutrients you can still starve even if your eating all the right foods!
Being active is also important so don't stop working out just change how your working out and what your doing. As you feed your body better it will become stronger.
I recommend walking outside! It relieves stress and builds bones. Yoga is a gift..... hatha or restorative yoga you'll be amazed at how a slow going activity can work you out. Swimming and water activities can also be useful for fitness as the water both supports and provides resistance!
some interesting links
http://www.coconutresearchcenter.org/index.htm
I found this product at whole foods. It's easier then opening an actual young coconut.... and it costs about 2 bucks.
http://www.onenaturalexperience.com/?gclid=CNWu5YD0zJcCFRPBDAod2V9G9Q#/one-drinks-coco
http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/herbsvitaminsek/a/Hypertension.htm
http://www.home-remedies-for-you.com/
http://www.thefooddoctor.com/
http://www.bodyecologydiet.com/
/www.yogajournal.com/
Not that I agree with everything but the have some good ideas.....http://www.prevention.com/cda/article/heal-yourself-with-food-recipes/08291e1fd9258110VgnVCM10000013281eac____/nutrition.recipes/nutrition.basics/foods.for.specific.conditions/
Remember when thinking about supplements if you can find a way to get it from food naturally it will be better then any pill.
oh and don't over look the importance of clean water.....
"Hypertension can be combated in many ways, such as quitting smoking, drinking alcohol or overweight. Water can also help lower this pressure, as blood is mainly comprised of water. If water levels drop, that can affect your blood pressure. So, drinking the healthy amount of water each say can maintain a healthy heart. Also, the kidneys clean the blood. If blood flow is limited to the kidneys because of lack of water or high blood pressure, it will think the body is low on water, and react by telling the brain to constrict veins and arteries, which will make pressure even higher."
......http://www.freedrinkingwater.com/water-education/medical-water-cholesterol.htm
Love you
Laura
MY GARDEN CATCH OF THE DAY 2011
February 6, 2011 at 8:15
Super bowl Sunday…. I have a shocking confession! I am sad I am not hosting a special guest with spicy, cheesy goodness I would never otherwise consider a meal.
***Disclaimer here for my non-US readers this is about AMERICAN FOOTBALL something you may never have thought I would write about. Yes Americans there are other games other places also call Football….
Having been a *football widow for years before my actual widowhood. *(Defined as: ALL things STOP during THE season on game days. Nothing gets fixed on game days. i.e.… just put a bucket under it… Food is expected to be delivered TV side. All conversations last only the duration of commercials. ...But only during the normal season not superbowl in which all commercials shall also be watched. Nothing said while a play is happening will count as an actual statement. Don’t talk about how nice the design of the helmets looks…) It had been a fun game to play before I developed hips. I could throw a spiral and catch a pass in school all girl games but unless your playing what’s the point? Still over the years I had developed indifference for watching profootball in to a healthy distaste. But that has changed this year even after an ended long-term relationship with a true fan. I have retained a weird lack of distaste for football... “He” told me, “it’s like a live game of chess the coaches are playing against each other.” Hum…. Simple statement but I mean, I could imagine my own ponds and rooks…. I no long cringe or have the fingernail across the chalkboard feeling in my gut when I hear broadcast TV with the game on. Not that I am seeking out games yet but, I know that the Super bowl is today in Dallas between green cheese heads and black and yellow Steelers. I watched most of the college and pro seasons. Well watched is a strong word, heard and ran in to watch replays… while cooking dinner. The thought came to me... I could BEcoming a football fan except, I don't care who wins. Weird I know! Maybe I’ll just fix the food and leave the door ajar just incase.
Or do you think it could be something else? Do you? Do you? Are you sure?
(NOT BY ME... AN NFL PHOTO)
GO teams! GO teams! Play your best have fun... Okay maybe I still have a ways to go.... before anybody would call me a REAL fan.
Ravenwolf 1997 on the river
~for Richard Darrell Halvorsen 6-12-63 to 5-8-04
Traditional; arr.: Paddy Moloney English lyric translations by Sean MacReamoinn
'Se/ mo laoch, mo Ghile Mear
'Se/ mo Chaesar Gile Mear
Suan na/ se/an ni/ bhfuaireas fe/in
O/ chuaigh i gce/in mo Ghile Mear
Grief and pain are all I know
My heart is sore
My tears a'flow
We saw him go.
.. No word we know of him, ochon
'Se/ mo laoch, mo Ghile Mear
'Se/ mo Chaesar Gile Mear
Suan na/ se/an ni/ bhfuaireas fe/in
O/ chuaigh i gce/in mo Ghile Mear
A proud and gallant chevalier
A high man's scion of gentle mean
A fiery blade engaged to reap
He'd break the bravest in the field
'Se/ mo laoch, mo Ghile Mear
'Se/ mo Chaesar Gile Mear
Suan na/ se/an ni/ bhfuaireas fe/in
O/ chuaigh i gce/in mo Ghile Mear
Come sing his praise as sweet harps play
And proudly toast his noble frame
With spirit and with mind aflame
So wish him strength and length of day
'Se/ mo laoch, mo Ghile Mear
'Se/ mo Chaesar Gile Mear
Suan na/ se/an ni/ bhfuaireas fe/in
O/ chuaigh i gce/in mo Ghile Mear
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A literal translation
Once I was a gentle maiden,
But now I am a spent, worn-out widow,
My consort strongly plowing the waves
Over the hills and far away.
He is my hero, my gallant darling,
He is my caesar, a gallant darling;
Ive found neither rest nor fortune
Since my gallant darling went far away.
Every day I am constantly enduring grief,
Weeping nitterly and shedding tears,
Because my lively lad has left me
And no news is told of him - alas!
The cuckoo does not sing cheerfully at noon
And the sound of hounds is not heard in nut-tree woods
Nor summer morning in misty glen
Since my lively boy went away from me.
Noble, proud young horseman,
Youth without gloom, of pleasant countenance,
A swift-moving fist, nimble in a fight,
Slaying the enemy and smiting the strong.
Let a strain be played on musical harps,
And let many quarts be filled on the table,
With high spirit, without fault, without gloom,
That my lion may receive long life and health.
Gallant darling for a while under sorrow,
And ireland completely under black cloacks,
I have found neither rest nor fortune
Since my gallant darling went far away.
Lyrics:
MO GHILE MEAR (Our Hero)
Traditional; arr.: Paddy Moloney
English lyric translations by Sean MacReamoinn
Ravenwolf and Logan 1992
Ravenwolf Jordan and me 1984
~ Laura Hurcomb
I looked for a poem today to tell a tale Of Snowmagedon
But none that fit our present state!
We are stuck at home this snowy day.
Kids and dogs have all gone crazy racing round inside the house
Thunder snow what next, lighting? With ...10 inches of the frosty flakes
The day before the sun was shinning, the stores were full.
Today their shelves are bare… I hope the power keeps on pumping..
With the crock pot full of beans and steamer full of rice
I still have bills to pay but no clients are in sight
Cars all stuck here and there… piles of snow in great big heaps
And now nowhere to go before I sleep,
no where to go before I sleep.
copyright LGHurcomb
********************
copyright LGHurcomb
Brain damaged, Sounds so awful!
I’m short bus special… not even sorry if that’s not PC
Gotta laf at yourself, at life, at what we’ve been through
1966 I flew from my mother’s Hudson on to a Los Angels highway
Unable to breathe my scream silenced by the speed
I can still see the road buzzing past under me
Sanding off half the surface of my face, palms of my hands, knees and shins
Bleeding I rose up and ran like frogger dodging cars to reach the roads edge
I awoke unable to deal with numbers. My brother's statement not to worry, He could get me work as a circus sideshow freak was some how comforting.
At 4 I was young enough it all grew back damage left unseen.
It’s amazing I even function, damaged goods. I wake talking to God every morning thankful I still breath, use me such as I am.
So many doors closed when that car door opened on the freeway that day.
Maybe I could have been a surgeon, scientist, whole; instead I’m an artist
They said I would never finish school …They were right I still go,
To teach at the University most days my students linger after class
Only evidence left at 50 is my learning disability, I loose words, see that squirrel!
A lingering tendency to cry in the dark and laugh at sunrise
And uncanny ability to see things others can’t
And a half smile that makes me look as if I am up to something
And that like my red hair is just a simple warning.
Marked by my creator like the tiny poison arrow frog
I’m perfected with my imperfection
I live on to fight another day
copyright LGHurcomb
http://www.braininjurypeervisitor.org/index.php?p=1_11_survivor-stories
copyright LGHurcomb
